Entertainment Reviews: March 31-April 6

Entertainment Reviews: March 31-April 6

“I really need to stop making so many white girls,” God tells Amy Schumer’s vapid character in “Would You Bang Her,” the confident first episode of Inside Amy Schumer’s second season. With the good looks of an all-American girl scout, the mouth of a sailor, and a healthy dose of confidence, Schumer has proven to be as unexpected as she is hilarious. That title: “Mostly Sex Stuff.” She chats with Brendan about finding God in Paul Giamatti, the outrageous feedback she gets, and the freaks who run public radio. Girl, You Don’t Need Makeup What is it: A One Direction-esque parody of the classic makeup double standard: guys tell us we don’t need it, but don’t think we look good without it. And jean shorts. I said it. I made sure for two days that I was ready to admit this to the world but Captain America 2 is the best superhero movie to date.

getting your hair to do what you want it to has been an age old challenge for millions of men and women.. The action is the best directed, most intense, and most fun of any superhero movies. Anyone having sex without a condom can acquire chlamydia at any age, but it’s more common in the teens and 20s. She smiles, joyful and relieved, and then turns to the camera—implicating us and inviting us in at the same time. Two action scenes in particular had the intensity of the bank robbery scene in Heat. Plus, the violence was pretty much upped for a PG-13 movie, people are kicked into engines, thrown under eighteen wheelers, kicked off of buildings, etc. Monster.

The event, the first official co-appearance for the Schumer relatives, came together after New York’s senior senator phoned the “Inside Amy Schumer” star in the wake of the Louisiana violence. The Winter Soldier looks and acts dangerous. He looks awesome and his fighting style combines technological weapons, short range weapons, and martial arts. In a way, they’re classic sketch comedy: a core premise extruded into a flexible script and brought to life by gifted improvisers. The opening shot in the jury room when they first enter as credits are rolling, the camera follows Henry Zebrowski, who is Juror #7 to the fan and then it follows him over to the window as they open the door, then the camera crosses the room as Juror #3 sits down next to Juror #2, played by Chris Gethard — that’s all a single take, so it had to be really rigidly choreographed to get all 12 guys in and into their places while the camera’s moving all around. So typical. Strange was mentioned by one character, CA’s neighbor was his girlfriend in the comics (and also the love of  his life’s niece, complicated!), and Quicksilver and the Scarlet Witch were introduced.

Schumer’s stand up about “mostly sex stuff” was nothing short of inspirational. Nowadays Fox owns the X-men rights so maybe the Disney contract included them somehow. Also, since they are in the Disney rights, they will not be mutants in The Avengers 2, they are experiments made by HYDRA. Nice! The characters have depth. Some superhero movies have very little depth to how the characters react to their situations and why (we must protect the universe because that is what we do) but this one went into more details behind the three heroes involved, and how Falcon and Captain America became friends. Plot is a conspiracy theory, mystery thriller.

Entertainment Reviews: March 31-April 6
Man, you really had to pay attention to each line of dialogue to keep up with the whole story, which was by far the best plot of a superhero movie to date. I feel bad if anyone got up to use the restroom. And then, at the end of the night, we would celebrate with a glass of wine… I mean it. I wasn’t bored for a second. The pacing of the film sets the bar for future films in the Marvel canon. Great music.

Old school, patriotic, intense soundtrack. The Marvin Gaye track at the end was a nice touch as well. Captain America fights St. Pierre. That’s right, the UFC master himself. That is how the movie STARTS!!!!! Great reveal in the plot twist.

Even though I knew what was coming, the audience didn’t, for the most part, and their large, unanimous “gasp” was legendary. Everyone cheered at the end. Enough said. Why does that only happen after Disney movies? Hmmmm…..I wonder….. You see, the problem with being a MOVIE ENTHUSIAST is I that I like pretty much all movies. But that theory is surely tested by movies like this.

It is a Western rip-off of The Crow with another action starring role by the does-he-f**king age Danny Trejo AKA Machete. As expected, the movie has horrible acting, horrible editing, and the whole time I was wondering is that bad guy really the same kid from The Breakfast Club (Anthony Michael Hall)? All bad stuff aside, however, Mickey Rourke played a pretty bad ass version of Satan, some of the cinematography and shots were awesome (see pics below), and the action was pretty gnarly and had enough to satisfy the average moviergoer till the end. It was just a smidge better than most straight to DVD movies. In terms of the number of pitches versus what ends up on screen, there are 10 times more pitches than sketches that end up in the episodes. Although the show is hit or miss with the comedy, it still has me coming back for each episode. Next she played a ridiculous sex crazed tennis player, a lowly secretary who couldn’t do her job, and then she interviewed a porn movie cinematographer who gave very funny and graphic descriptions of his day to day work.

A fantastic tribute album to the late metal rocker James Dio, every track is laid down with the same ferocity and passion as the man himself. So, now that you know it is good, all sales from the album will go to cancer research (Dio died at 67 of stomach cancer). Dio was also a huge influence on the Tenacious D band and movie. They provide a perfect cover of the song “The Last in Line.”  Other contributors include Anthrax, Adrenaline Mob, Corey Taylor of Slipknot, Halestorm, Motorhead, Scorpions, Doro, Killswitch Engage, Metallica, and Dio himself. The Used is back with their heavy guitar riffs and their lead singer’s piercing screams and large vocal range. This is their 6th album and it is very different than their earlier heavy sound (although they do excel and slower, more melodic love themed songs). This album is more polished and has a lot more production values.

Many of the tracks have a lullaby, dream like quality with backup singers to help the melodic lyrics. While most people consider this style “too pop like” I enjoyed this album all the way through even on the first listen. As a band, their music started off harder and with less expectations ten years ago so going to a safer, more enjoyable sonic recording to get their theme across really worked for me. Or maybe I’m just getting older. Now here is an album to rock out to if you grew up in the 90s. Not all the tracks worked for me, but some of the remakes were absolutely wonderful (if not better than the original versions).

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